"RED" and update on that thing I didn't want to do

Last night a friend was an emotional basket case, so of course we indulged in much girl talk, food therapy, and went to see RED.

POTENTIAL SPOILER ALERT - Let me start by saying this is a terrific movie. John Malkovich is hysterical, Bruce Willis is simmering and intense, Morgan Freeman is ...well, Morgan Freeman (hello...) and Helen Mirren is AWESOME!!!! She is the single coolest female character ever. She kills people for a living and loves it, and shoots things and blows shit up, and bakes and decorates her house to perfection and shoots the love of her life and is just freaking awesome. Yes - I have a lady crush. Anyway, funny, action packed, and cool - go see it people. Really, right now, stop what you're doing and run to the theater and see this movie. I may need to see it again myself. My son (don't worry - he's an adult) would enjoy this and how cool a mom would I be if I take him....

So, it was the perfect movie when you are feeling broken. My girl friend and I have decided we are both broken, for various reasons (don't judge - who isn't? hmmm...) and started our own little club - current members total two. So, this is where the friend rescue collides with all the other forces of the universe (remember the last blog - I spoke of them colluding to make me dig into my past) to once again make me look at myself under a microscope - Grrr.

I did the journaling, troops. I did it and 30 pages of scribbling and a box of Kleenex later, I still have no real answers. Perhaps a little insight (not 100% sure) but mostly I concluded I am a broken fraud. How is this helpful? Perhaps I am so damn broken, and have my closet so well protected that even opening that one door doesn't help when I have an unending supply of more doors behind the first. You know like that infinity type thing you can see when viewing something in two opposing mirrors...(I hope you got that image - it was cool). So, then my friend is in the same boat and we are commiserating and one upping each other with horror stories from our past (anything that isn't future counts as past - got it?) and crying and laughing our butts off at some of the horror stories. It was a day - we'll leave it at that.

Now, if you'll remember from the last post, I did this in an effort to figure out my characters so I can achieve writing greatness. I tried to get inside my heroine's head and guess what? I still have no freaking clue who this chick is - if anything I know less now than I did before. GRRRRR. I am now shaking my head sadly because I have to figure this out. My gal is the lynch pin to my story and professional people are waiting to see said story and lynch pin is missing, thus story is missing. I'm trying yet another character sketch exercise today to try and figure her out - wish me luck.